Yesterday, my dog was unexpectedly brought to the animal hospital because apparently, there’s still one more puppy inside her tummy and therefore it was inevitable to cut her uterus because the baby was stuck inside. Also, to make it worse there’s this certain bacteria inside her tummy that she got way long ago before we even adopted her. IT WAS HORRIFYING TO KNOW ALL THAT IN ONE NIGHT. Hell, I have no idea how I was able to stabilize my speaking when I needed to. It was painful for me because even now as I type about it, it makes me cry. It’s my baby was all I said when my father was comforting me. To be honest, I know she’ll be fine because I have confidence in the doctors and I know God, St Therese, my Papa Ben, my Mama Ching and my Papa Lolo are all going to make sure she will be fine but the fact that she’s my baby, well, I just didn’t care that everyone saw me cry. Tears kept flowing and flowing as if it’s part of some river in Egypt. It was the one of the worst heartache ever because I felt helpless. The only thing that I can do was love her more. It was difficult for me the most because I do not cry in front of my parents whenever I am experiencing pain, I never showed them I cried when I failed a subject before-I never show any kind of weakness. But yesterday, I was so vulnerable I told myself “fuck you all, I am crying. It hurts and I will cry to ease the pain.” but I am so thankful God and St Therese got my back. I know my Papa Ben was there because for some reason, I felt him. Oh what a day yesterday was, mixed emotions and all that. I am stronger now though and since my baby girl survived, she is stronger now and she’ll live longer.
Thank you, God. Thank you, St Therese. Thank you, Papa Ben. Thank you, Mama Ching. Thank you, Papa Lolo.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Oh and God, thank you for all of our puppies. We will take care of them and they’ll have very long lives. Thank you. 🙂